The Match Lab

8 Best Tinder Conversation Starters (And Why They Work)

Starting a conversation on Tinder is hard.


A good conversation starter is key if you want to pique a match’s interest and get a response on Tinder.

Because remember — your conversation starter will set the tone for the entire interaction.

Tinder conversation starters should be personalized to your match, with a balance of being funny, flirty, thought-provoking, or just warm and friendly.

So, here are the best conversation starters you can go ahead and use on your next Tinder match.

The 8 Best Conversation Starters for Tinder

1. Two Truths and a Lie

This classic icebreaker game is one of the best conversation starters on Tinder.

It’s intriguing, engaging, and adds a splash of mystery.

It’s also one of the most effective ways to get a response from a match.

To play “two truths and a lie,” send your match a message that shares two true facts about yourself and one lie.

Then, ask your match to guess which statement is false.

This conversation starter gets the ball rolling for a playful convo and also provide a chance to learn new and interesting facts about each other that’ll keep the conversation going.

2. Would You Rather…?

Asking a “Would you rather…” question is another great way to start a conversation on Tinder.

By sending your match an interesting or creative thought experiment, you allow them to share their preferences, opinions, and values with you in a fun way.

Some examples for “Would you rather” questions include:

Would you rather have a rewind button for your life or a pause button for your life?

Would you rather have unlimited money but never find true love or find true love but never have much money?

Would you rather travel to the past and meet your ancestors or travel to the future and meet your descendants?

3. Ask About a Shared Interest or Experience

Connecting with someone over shared interests or experiences is a tried-and-true way to start a conversation on Tinder.

Take a moment to look through your match’s profile carefully and see what hobbies, activities, past experiences, or future goals they’ve mentioned.

Look at their photos and their bio for information.

When you find something you two have in common, work on writing an opening message about it.

A good way to do this is to ask your match a question about their interest.

You can also share your own personal take or story about that shared interest.

For example, if your match has a picture of them hiking, you could send a message like, “Hey, it looks like you’re into hiking too. Have you been to any good trails recently?”

This opener is personalized to your match’s interests and invites a conversation where you and your match can both give and take.

4. Ask a Question to Learn About Your Match

Asking open-ended questions is the bread and butter of good conversation.

That’s why asking a question will always make for the best Tinder conversation starter.

On Tinder, your match’s profile pictures and bio can give you some great ideas for conversation starters.

Find something you’re curious about and ask your match a question on it to learn more.

Look for specific details in their photos that stand out, such as a unique outfit or an exciting backdrop.

Then, ask about the story behind the photo.

That’s it.

That’s how to write a good conversation starter on Tinder.

For example, if your match has a picture with a cute dog in their profile, you can say, “That’s one cute dog in your photo there. What’s their name and breed?”

Even better would be to ask an open-ended question like “What’s your dog’s weirdest quirk?” or “What do you think your dog’s job would be if they were a human?”

Also, use your match’s bio to gather information about their likes, dislikes, or other details that could be the basis for your opening message.

If they mention a passion for cooking, for example, try something like, “Hey chef, what’s your go-to dish you’ll make when you want to impress someone?”

By taking the time to analyze the profile pictures and bios of your matches on Tinder, you can craft engaging, personalized openers that appeal directly to your match’s interests and effectively start conversations.

5. Send an Exaggerated Compliment

A playful approach to start a conversation on Tinder is to give your match a slightly exaggerated compliment.

This can be a fun way to express your interest without coming across as too serious or forward.

Find something in their profile that stands out, such as a unique hobby or an interesting photo, and then give it a creative twist with your compliment.

For example, if your match has a picture of themselves hiking, you might say, “Wow, did you scale Mount Everest just to get the perfect profile pic?”

Or if they mention their love for a specific band, try something like, “You have such good taste in music, I bet even Mozart would be impressed.”

Using this type of humor demonstrates confidence and can make your Tinder match feel more at ease.

Just be sure to keep it lighthearted and avoid crossing the line into insincere or offensive territory.

Make your compliment specific and customized to your match.

Remember, the goal is to spark conversation and establish rapport, so have fun with it and keep things positive.

6. Intriguing Hypotheticals

Using hypothetical scenarios can be a great way to tap into someone’s imagination and interests.

This type of conversation starter forces someone to think outside the box and share their thoughts on unique situations.

Examples of engaging hypotheticals you could use as a conversation starter on Tinder include:

If you could have any superpower for a day, what would you choose and why?

If you had to eat only one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Which historical figure would you choose to have dinner with and why?

7. Travel Experiences and Plans

Discussing travel experiences tends to resonate with many people and gets them to start chatting.

Sharing travel adventures or asking about future plans can be fun, providing insight into someone’s personality and interests.

Here are some travel-related conversation starters you could use on Tinder:

Your photos show some great travels. What’s next on your travel bucket list?

What’s been your most memorable travel experience so far?

When you travel, do you prefer exploring busy cities or getting lost in the outdoors?

8. Just Send a GIF

Don’t have any ideas for what to send as your first message to someone on Tinder?

Well then, just send a GIF.

Yes, that’s right. You can send your match a GIF as your opener and let that be your conversation starter.

Make it a funny GIF that invites a response.

An idea is to send the GIF and then ask your match something like “On a scale of 1-10, how well does this GIF capture your personality?”

GIFs are visually engaging and can catch someone’s eye more than a regular text message.

And if you choose a GIF related to a shared interest or hobby based on your match’s profile, it can instantly create a connection and serve as a conversation starter.

Why Good Conversation Starters Matter on Tinder

Sending great Tinder conversation starters is so important because it’s your first and only opportunity to get your match interested.

It’s crucial to make your first message count.

Otherwise, you won’t be having many conversations on the app at all.

A well-thought-out conversation starter can lead to an engaging and fun conversation.

You’ll get to know your match better and discover common interests, values, or activities you both enjoy.

By finding those shared interests, you start to bond with your match, feel connected, and come up with ideas for what to do on a first date in person.

Using thoughtful conversation starters also shows your match that you put time and effort into your approach rather than resorting to generic openers.

Demonstrating creativity and genuine interest will set you apart from the masses of others on Tinder who are not making the same effort.

This makes it more likely for your match to respond and be enthusiastic about getting to know you better.

To improve your chances of making a connection with your conversation starter, try using some humor, sharing something interesting, asking open-ended questions, and highlighting a shared interest.

Personalized openers are the best way to make your message stand out.

Taking the time to tailor your message to your match based on their profile can make the difference between getting ignored and getting a response.

That’s the recipe for sparking conversation on Tinder.

Avoiding Common Tinder Conversation Starter Mistakes

When it comes to starting a conversation on Tinder, there are some common mistakes that you should avoid.

Don’t Send Overused Pickup Lines

Avoid using cliché or overused pickup lines, as they quickly become tiresome and often make your match roll their eyes.

Instead, be original and think of something that speaks to your match’s profile and their interests.

Reference something you both have in common or ask open-ended questions to spark interest in a genuine conversation.

Avoid Negging and Insults

Negging, which is the act of giving backhanded compliments or subtle insults, is not only disrespectful but also ineffective.

It’s important to treat your matches with respect if you want them to respond and consider you.

Focus on finding common ground, sharing personal experiences, flirting through light teasing, and showing genuine interest in getting to know them, rather than trying to manipulate their emotions.

Following Up and Maintaining Interest

When it comes to having a conversation on Tinder, keeping the other person engaged is essential.

The last thing you want is for your conversation to die out just when you’ve started it.

Here are some tips to help you follow up on your opener and maintain interest in your chats:

Have a Give and Take Conversation

A good conversation should involve both you and your match sharing and asking questions. 

Make sure to balance asking open-ended questions about their interests, experiences, and opinions with sharing your own.

For example, if you notice that your match loves traveling, ask about their favorite travel spots and share your most memorable trip.

This creates a sense of mutual interest and encourages your match to stay engaged.

Tinder conversations should flow naturally and not feel like an interrogation or an interview.

Know When to Change the Topic

Pay attention to your match’s responses and adapt your questions and comments accordingly.

If they seem enthusiastic about a topic, explore it further.

And if they don’t show much interest, switch to a new subject.

Lighten Up

Don’t be afraid to incorporate humor into your conversations as it can help give your chats a more lighthearted and relaxed vibe.

Be cautious about pushing boundaries with your humor, though, as your conversation will definitely die out if you seriously offend your match.

Show Social Intelligence

To keep the conversation going, show some social intelligence by picking up on cues that reveal your match’s mood or preferences.

Use techniques to validate their emotions and express empathy, while allowing yourself to be vulnerable.

Frequently Asked Questions About Tinder Conversation Starters

How can I maintain engaging conversations on Tinder?

To keep your conversations going on Tinder, be genuinely interested in what the other person is saying and respond thoughtfully.

Keep the conversation balanced by giving them the opportunity to share their thoughts and experiences as well.

Make use of the conversation starter questions listed above as conversation extenders when needed.

What are the best ways to transition to deeper topics in a Tinder convo?

Transitioning to deeper topics can happen when you’ve successfully built trust and rapport with your match.

Start with lighter topics and gradually move to more personal or philosophical questions.

Look for cues in their responses to explore further and ensure that they’re comfortable with the direction of the conversation.

How to showcase your personality effectively when chatting on Tinder?

Showcasing your personality effectively involves being genuine, open, and honest about your likes, dislikes, hobbies, and values.

Avoid trying to fit into someone else’s expectations.

Share personal stories and anecdotes that reflect your personality, and don’t be afraid to show your sense of humor or vulnerability when appropriate.

Want Help Creating a Great Tinder Profile?

We at The Match Lab have spent years studying the science of how to write good Tinder bios and how to select the right photos to use in a Tinder profile.

After years of research, we have developed a dating photo analyzer that uses an algorithm to select any person’s best photos for Tinder, or any other dating app. Just upload some photos of yourself, and our algorithm will reveal which photos you should be using in your Tinder profile and the ideal order they should go in.

We also offer professional dating profile writing services. Our professional Tinder profile writer can write your Tinder bio for you and help your profile stand out from the crowd.

Get started now, or learn more about us on our website, so you can start getting more likes and better matches on Tinder.

Recent Posts