50 Best Fish Jokes

·  Why don’t fish like playing basketball?
Because they’re afraid of the net.

·  Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.

·  How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten-tickles.

·  Why did the dog jump from the boat into the ocean?
He thought he saw a catfish.

·  What do you call a fish that destroys Japan?
Codzilla.

·  What did the fish say when he saw an old friend?
Long time no sea.

·  What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh.

·  What’s the difference between a piano and a fish?
You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.

·  What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.

·  What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.

·  How do fish get high?
Seaweed.

·  What do fish use to fix their homes?
A hammerhead shark.

·  Why did the fish always get into trouble?
He couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

Read: 46 Fishing Pick Up Lines

·  What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A Sturgeon.

·  What is a pirate’s favorite fish?
A swordfish.

·  Why don’t fish ever get lost?
They always follow the current.

·  What do you call a fish with three eyes?
Fiiish.

·  Where do fish sleep?
On the seabed.

·  What do you call a fish that won’t shut up?
A big mouthed bass.

·  Why was the fish at the bank?
To check his current balance.

·  What is a fish’s favorite day of the week?
Fry-day.

·  How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “g.”

·  What do fish wear to keep warm?
An anemoneck sweater.

·  What do you call a fish that only comes out at night?
A starfish.

·  What do fish take when they’re sick?
Vitamin Sea.

·  What did the fish say to the fisherman?
Hold up. What’s your angle?

·  Why are fish so easy to weigh?
They have their own scales.

·  Why do fish live in saltwater?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.

·  Why did the jellyfish go to a protest?
As a paci-fish, she opposed Portuguese man-of-war.

·  What do you call a fish with two knees?
A two-knee fish.

Read: 40 Best Turtle Jokes

·  What did the fish say after hearing her date’s musical number?
I’m hooked!

·  What do fish say to each other on Valentine’s Day?
I’m hooked on you.

·  What do fish say when they fail a test?
Oh, carp!

·  What did the octopus say to the fish?
Let’s hold hands… and hands, and hands.

·  Why are fish bad at debates?
Because they’re always jumping to conclusions.

·  Why was the fish excited to join Tinder?
He heard there were a lot of catfishes on there.

·  What is a fish’s favorite type of music?
Something catchy.

·  Why don’t fish play hide and seek?
They’re afraid of being found.

·  Why was the fish so good at school?
Because it was always swimming in knowledge.

·  What do you call a fish that wears a crown?
A kingfish.

·  What’s the fish’s favorite instrument?
The bass guitar.

·  Why do fish never do well at school?
They’re always below sea level.

·  What is a fish’s favorite part of a song?
The hook.

·  Why don’t fish make good musicians?
They’re afraid of scales.

·  What do fish like to play at parties?
Salmon Says.

·  What did the fish say to his shy friend?
Stop being so koi.

·  What do you call a fish that’s really smart?
A brain sturgeon.

·  What do fish use to call each other?
A shell phone.

·  Why don’t fish like the internet?
They’re afraid of getting caught in the net.

·  Why don’t fish like to play cards?
Because they’re afraid of the river.

·  Why did the fish go to Hollywood?
To be a starfish.

·  What do you call a fish that tells jokes?
A clownfish.

·  Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in schools.

·  Why was the fish so successful on dating apps?
It knew how to cast a wide net.

·  Why don’t fish like to play football?
They’re afraid of the tackle.

Read: 40 Best Shark Jokes