50 Construction Jokes That Nail the Punchline
Why don’t construction workers ever need to go to the bar?
Because they get hammered at work.
Why do construction workers make good comedians?
They always nail the punchline.
Why did the construction worker bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house.
Why don’t construction workers mind criticism at work?
Because it’s all constructive criticism.
What do you call a construction worker who can’t build?
A demolition expert.
Why did the construction worker always carry a ladder?
He wanted to get high on the job.
What’s a construction worker’s least favorite season?
Fall.
How do construction workers party?
They raise the roof.
Why did the construction worker go to therapy?
To build a better foundation.
What did the construction worker say to the new hire?
“Working with you is a lot like working by myself… only harder.”
Why did the construction worker break up with the elevator?
He couldn’t fix her ups and downs.
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How does a construction worker win a debate?
By providing the most concrete evidence.
What’s a construction worker’s favorite music?
Heavy metal.
Why did the construction worker wear glasses?
To improve his site.
How do construction workers explain things?
In concrete terms.
What do you call a construction worker without a toolbox?
Unemployed.
Why did the construction worker refuse a promotion?
He didn’t want more stories to tell.
What’s a construction worker’s favorite type of bird?
The crane.
What’s a construction worker’s favorite vegetable?
Beam sprouts.
How do construction workers keep secrets?
They bury them.
What’s an experienced construction worker’s mantra?
“I’m here for the income, not the outcome.”
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What’s a construction worker’s favorite type of movie?
Suspense, with lots of scaffolding.
Why did the construction worker always carry a map?
He didn’t want to lose his bearings!
Why don’t construction workers play poker?
They don’t like to gamble with their tools!
Why did the construction worker go to the party?
He wanted to get hammered!
What’s a construction worker’s favorite store?
Build-a-Bear.
Why did the construction worker become a chef?
He wanted to stir things up!
Why don’t builders wear ties?
They like to let loose!
Why did the builder take up painting?
He wanted to brush up on his skills!
Why was the construction worker always calm?
He knew how to keep things level.
Why did the construction worker bring a camera to work?
He wanted to capture every moment!
What’s a construction worker’s favorite board game?
Risk.
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How do construction workers get to work on time?
By any beams necessary.
Why did the construction worker go to the comedy club?
He wanted to crack up!
Why did the builder always eat at the diner?
He liked his eggs over-easy!
Why did the construction worker start a choir?
He wanted to raise the bar!
Why did the construction worker bring a mirror to work?
He liked to reflect on his progress.
Why did the construction worker go to the mall?
He wanted to shop for the latest tools!
Why did the construction worker go to the museum?
He wanted to see the architecture!
Why did the construction worker go to a magic show?
He wanted to learn some tricks of the trade!
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Why was the construction worker bad at math?
He always counted on his fingers!
Why did the construction worker become a writer?
He wanted to draft great stories!
Why did the construction worker go to the opera?
He heard there would be a lot of high notes!
Why did the construction worker go to the race track?
He wanted to check out the framework!
Why did the construction worker become a politician?
He wanted to build a better future.
Why don’t builders like football?
They’re afraid of getting plastered!
Why did the builder join the navy?
He wanted to hit the deck!
Why did the construction worker bring a ladder to the office?
He wanted to climb the corporate ladder.