The Match Lab

25 Best Submarine Jokes


Why did the submarine flunk school? It kept going below C level.

Why don’t submarines get stressed? They’re used to being under a lot of pressure.

What do you call a submarine sailor who isn’t talkative or energetic? A subdued sub dude.

How do submarines like their pizza? Deep dish.

What’s a submarine’s favorite color? Navy blue.

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How do submarines go to sleep? They drift off.

What do submarines use to get high? Seaweed.

Why are submarines so in need of therapy? They never let their emotions surface.

Why did the submarine cross the ocean? To get to the other tide.

Why don’t submarines have many friends? They’re too submerged in their work.

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Why do submarines make great singers? They always hit the deep notes.

Why did the submarine blush? It saw the ocean’s bottom.

Why are submarines bad at soccer? Their kicks are sub-par.

What do you wear to a wedding in a submarine? A dive suit.

Why do submarines make great detectives? They go deeper into the case than anyone else.

Read: 50 Best Water Jokes

Why did the submarine have a panic attack? It was under too much pressure.

Why was the submarine always upbeat? It had a buoyant personality.

Why did the submarine visit the psychiatrist? It had deep-seated issues.

What’s the submarine’s favorite board game? Battleships.

Why was the submarine a good student? It dove into its studies.

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How do submarines like their music? With lots of bass.

How do submarines stay cool in summer? They stay below the heat wave.

How do submarines stay informed? They listen to the current news.

Why did the submarine get promoted at work? It was great at working under pressure.

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