The Match Lab

30 Funniest 4th of July Jokes


What’s red, white, blue, and green? A seasick Uncle Sam.

What’s the best tea to drink on the 4th of July? Liber-tea.

Why did the duck say “bang” on the 4th of July? Because it was a firequacker.

What do you get when you cross a patriot with a small dog? Yankee Poodle.

What dance move do you to do celebrate the 4th of July? The independance.

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What did the ghost wear on the 4th of July? Red, white, and boo!

Why did the British cross the Atlantic? To get to the other tide.

What did one flag say to the other flag? Nothing, it just waved.

What have Americans done that ants haven’t yet? Stopped living in colonies.

Not everyone gets the 4th of July off from work. Fire works.

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Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington? Because the horse was too heavy to carry.

What’s the difference between a duck and George Washington? One has a bill on their face; the other has their face on a bill.

Why aren’t there any knock-knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings.

What’s the best thing to put into a hotdog on the 4th of July? Your teeth.

Why don’t people visit Mount Rushmore anymore? They take it for granite.

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What do you call an American drawing? A Yankee doodle.

What was George Washington’s favorite tree as a baby? The infantry.

What’s Uncle Sam’s favorite snack? Firecrackers.

Why did the American flag go to therapy? To expose its true colors.

Was the Declaration of Independence written in Philadelphia? No, it was written in ink.

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Why did the British cross the Atlantic? To attend the Boston Tea Party.

How do you know firecrackers love the 4th of July? They have a blast.

How do 4th of July fireworks stay hydrated? They drink sprarkling water.

Why was the American Revolution like a magic trick? Because it happened with a lot of Hocus POTUS.

What’s the best way to start a 4th of July barbecue? With a “meat” and greet.

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Which flag has the highest Yelp rating? The American flag. It has 50 stars.

What do fireworks eat for breakfast? Snap, crackle, and pop: Rice Krispies.

What’s a firework’s favorite snack? Popcorn.

What do you get when you cross Captain America with the Incredible Hulk? The Star-Spangled Banner.

What’s the most patriotic sport? Flag football.

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