30 Funniest September Jokes
How many seconds are there in September? One: September 2nd.
Why is September so good at math? Every day, it subtracts a few degrees from yesterday’s temperature.
What did December say to September? “I bring white Christmases, you just bring back-to-school blues.”
Where does September come after October? In the dictionary.
Why do birds fly south in September? Because it’s too far to walk.
Read: 31 Funniest October Jokes
Isn’t it ironic that we celebrate LABOR Day by not working?
What did October say to September? “Nice leaves, I’ll take it from here with the real fall colors.”
What did the leaves say on August 31st? “Rake me up when September ends.”
Now that September has ended, did anyone remember to wake up Green Day?
What did July say to September? “You’re just the awkward time in between fireworks and Halloween.”
Read: 30 Best ‘It’s So Cold…’ Jokes
Why was the computer cold in September? It left its Windows open.
What is a tree’s least favorite month? Sep-timber.
Why do people with a fear of heights hate September? They’re afraid of the fall.
What’s a tree’s favorite fall drink? Root beer.
Why is September so wise? Because it always turns over a new leaf.
Read: 30 Best ‘It’s So Hot…’ Jokes
What did June say to September? “While I save daylight, you just darken the days.”
What did May say to September? “I shower the world with flowers, you just clog up the gutters.”
What did August say to September? “You’re just the countdown to winter.”
What did September say when it had a crush on October? “I’m falling for you.”
Why did September go to the optometrist? It couldn’t see the summer ending.
Read: 45 Best Fall Jokes
What did February say to September? “I’m the shortest month and I still have more holidays than you.”
What’s September’s favorite type of vest? A fall harvest.
Why did the chicken cross the road in September? To get to the other cider.
What’s September’s favorite color? Fall foliage.
Read: 30 Best Rain Jokes
Why did the student bring a ladder to school in September? To reach the high expectations.
Why don’t summer and September get along? They have a falling out every year.
What’s Harry Potter’s favorite spell to do in September? Leafus disappearus.
What did June say to September? “Summer starts fun with me, then you just end it.”
What did March say to September? “At least when I change the weather, it’s called hope.”
