31 Best December Jokes
Why was the Grinch afraid of Santa Claus?
He was Claustrophobic.
Why can’t snowmen lose their temper?
They’ll have a meltdown.
What do you call a snowman with a sunburn?
A puddle.
What’s the smartest type of animal at the North Pole?
Braindeer.
What do snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
What’s white and goes up?
A confused snowflake.
What do you get if you cross December with a vampire?
Frostbite.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast in December?
Frosted Flakes.
What do you call an expired snowman?
Water.
Read: 25 Best Christmas Knock Knock Jokes
Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctor in December?
He felt crummy.
How many seconds are there in December?
One: December 2nd.
Why did December get a parking ticket?
It left its sleigh in a snow parking zone.
What do you call an elf who raps?
A wrapper.
What do you call an elf who wins the lottery in December?
Welfy.
How do paychecks come in December?
In cold hard cash.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
What did May say to December?
“I bring flowers, you just bring chills.”
What did December use to browse the web?
The winternet.
What did the gingerbread man put on his bed in December?
A cookie sheet.
Read: 30 Best ‘It’s So Cold…’ Jokes
Where do snowmen keep their money?
In a snow bank.
Why did the snowman call his dog Frost?
Because Frost bites.
What do you call dirty dancing at Santa’s house?
North pole dancing.
What do you call a formal dance in December?
A snowball.
Why don’t mountains get cold in December?
They wear snow caps.
What do sheep say to each other in December?
“Fleece Navidad.”
What’s December’s favorite type of music?
Chill out.
Why did Santa’s helper see a therapist?
For low “elf” esteem.
Why was the computer cold in December?
It left its Windows open.
What’s December’s favorite breakfast?
Ice Krispies.
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Also read: 25 Best Nut Jokes